


i'll find you if i have to tear time itself apart

by potstickermaster



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: AU, F/F, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2018-04-16
Packaged: 2019-04-23 18:33:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14338533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/potstickermaster/pseuds/potstickermaster
Summary: “Are you ever going to tell me your name?” Kara asked, finally, one time after the girl just broke down an argument she had outlined for a proposal to the Council.The girl just smiled at her—it was different, this time, not her usual teasing smirks, but like she was actually...endeared. “Depends,” she said. “Will you go out with me if I tell you?”//Her name was Lena.-Or where Lena and Kara met and dated in Krypton.





	i'll find you if i have to tear time itself apart

“I’ll find you,” she promised, her smile a calm in the storm around her. Almost silence filled Kara’s ears as the pod closed, like she was underwater, and there was glass between her and the woman who stood within her reach but not quite. She placed her hand on the window of the pod and from the other side smiled—one that was full of courage and promise. She only pulled away when Kara’s pod lifted off the ground and within seconds headed on to its way, and last thing Kara saw was _her,_ standing still, watching her leave like she always did.

Kara was barely out of the atmosphere when Krypton exploded, the force of it rocking Kara’s pod off its course.

//

Kara wakes up with a jolt, hands gripping her sheets tightly that they rip in half as she sits up, gasping for breath. There are tears in her eyes and her heart is pounding as the image of her, smiling as she watched Kara leave their dying planet, burns in the back of her eyelids. Kara takes a shuddering breath. It’s still dark outside and a minute scan of the city beyond tells Kara it’s barely sunrise but she is already getting up, wiping her tears with the back of her hand and heading to her bathroom to shower.

The apartment gets lonelier when dreams of _her_ —nightmares?—plague Kara’s mind, and not even boiling water helps distract her. All she could think of is _her._ She has tried to forget how long it’s been but she knows, without thinking.

Five  Earth months and twelve days.

//

Cat Grant’s incessant requests and ridiculous orders are a welcome distraction to Kara’s predicament. In her haste to carry out each and every command of the woman, Kara manages to avoid thinking about _her_ —or maybe, it’s the other way around; that she scrambles to obey each of Miss Grant’s request so she doesn’t think about _her._ Either way, Kara is thankful for not being able to breathe.

It’s fitting, since no one else from Krypton can do the same anymore.

//

Her phone rings. It’s a call from Alex Danvers, an update about Kara’s request to look for other possible Kryptonian sightings. It would be easy for the DEO to find any and all of such, considering it took them barely two minutes to track Kara’s pod after she breached the Earth’s atmosphere. Groggy and too out of it then, Kara was only able to say _her_ name before passing out, and then waking up tied up to a metal bed.

It was then she found out about her strengths in this planet—Earth, she was told, before remembering _her_ telling Kara that it was where she put the coordinates to. She easily freed herself from her metal binds, sighed tiredly as several heavily armed people—humans—pointed weapons at her. Kara only put her hands up in surrender, said she came to Earth in peace.

She was labeled a refugee after telling her story. An Agent Vasquez called her a survivor of sorts. Kara only smiled even as fear and grief choked her, while an Agent Alex Danvers and a Dr. Hamilton fiddled around with various tubes and wires and metals—most of which didn’t work on Kara—and she didn’t even realize she was crying until there was no one but Agent Danvers in the room.

“Hey,” she said softly, and Kara could barely make out her figure through her tears. “You’re alright. “You’re going to be alright,” she promised, voice soft and sure as if she knew the entirety of what happened to Kara, to Kara’s planet.

She knew nothing. She knew nothing of the ache Kara felt, the pain of losing her home, her family, the love of her life.

“Are there others?” Kara managed with an almost whimper.

Alex shook her head, squeezed Kara’s knee in a gentle way that shook the Kryptonian.

“We’ll find them,” the human promised.

Kara remembers her all over again and she breaks, once more.

//

Kara’s heart falls to her feet and she cries, in the women’s bathroom of CatCo’s highest floor, because Alex said their lead turned out to be a ship of another planetary origin and not at all of what Kara has hoped for.

“We  won’t stop looking,” Alex promises, and Kara thanks her anyway. She is glad for her; she is the closest person to Kara at this point, her and Director J’onn, a green Martian, a last of his kind, and every day Kara sees him is filled with both gratitude and dread.

//

Kara wakes up slowly. When she opens her eyes, however, there is still darkness  beyond her. Looking down, she realizes she is still in her pod, floating aimlessly in the Phantom Zone as she counted down the days—months? years? she doesn’t know. She closes her eyes, suddenly tired, and when she opens them again, she is in bed, arms wrapped around a familiar form, dark hair against her face. She smiles and kisses the back of the woman’s shoulder.

“Hello, beloved,” Kara whispers, and the woman turns in her arms, all warm smile and sleepy but adoring gaze.

“Hey, Kara,” she says. She reaches out and cups Kara’s cheek. Kara makes a move to kiss her palm but the woman stills her, smile turning cold. “You should have died with the rest of us.”

//

Kara wakes up with a jolt, skin soaked with sweat and heart threatening to rip out of her chest. Her cheeks burn with tears and a sob wracks her body, made of steel under this planet’s yellow sun but still so fragile with the weight of her heartache. She takes a shuddering breath. Her clock on the bedside table tells her it’s barely midnight. The city is still wide awake, and in the distance she hears screams for help. Pushing her grief aside, Kara focuses her hearing to where it’s all coming from. A fire.

She wants to help.  She really does, but she doesn’t want to be put on hot water with the DEO, not with her request still unfinished, but the ever selfless part of her wins and she wears a sort of disguise and flies to the location. She keeps herself hidden as she blows out the fire, carries a couple of people out of the building, and leaves before anyone could take notice.

The DEO notices, of course, and Alex is calling her later in the day as Kara juggles carrying layouts to digital and bringing Miss Grant’s lunch to remind her to be careful.

Kara almost scoffs. What is the point of being careful? Most days she just wants to—

“I know what you’re thinking,” Alex says in Kara’s silence. The agent’s voice is soft and understanding. “We’ll find her, okay?”

 _Her._ Kara had told Alex about _her,_ some time ago, she couldn’t even remember—the nightmares keep coming and all she could do was fly around and visit DEO just to ask for updates even if she knew they were already doing their best. The Kryptonian is grateful for the redheaded agent, both for the help and for keeping her grounded.

Keeping her hopeful.

//

Six  Earth months and nineteen days. Kara loiters around DEO when Alex mentioned earlier that they may have a new lead, and though the agent had warned the Kryptonian to not get her hopes up, she does anyway. It is all she has most days, hope; she finds herself sketching the shield of the House of El on the map she had in front of her.

“What’s that?” Alex asks.

Kara blinks at the symbol in front of her. “It’s the symbol of the House of El. My- my family’s symbol.” There is cotton in her throat and she swallows the guilt of living. “It means hope.”

Alex nods and squeezes her shoulder.

“Hold on to it.”

//

On days when her nights had been dreamless, Kara could only think of how life is now, for _her,_ if she was indeed alive and on Earth. Was she looking for Kara like she promised? Has she moved on? It has been twenty four Earth years, after all, and seven months and two days, and Kara cries at the thought of all their lost time with her pod stuck in the Phantom Zone. Kara could only imagine the heartache _she_ felt, as her days of looking for her beloved turned into years, until she had just finally given up, perhaps. Has she found someone else?

Did she even escape Krypton?

//

The thing about having her abilities on Earth is that she hears everything. Sometimes, when all _her_ memories prove too much to remember—or when Kara can’t figure out if what she is thinking of is a memory or just her imagination and _Rao, it’s been too long, beloved_ —she goes on to listen to all of the world: the whispers and the screams and all the sounds the Earth could give her.

All of these heartbeats, and yet she can’t find _hers._ Is it because she’s too far?

Or is it because Kara can’t remember _her_ anymore?

“I’ll find you,” she said. Was that what she said? Kara couldn’t quite remember anymore. She faults time and cries herself to sleep, holding on to hope and all the memories she had of Krypton, of home, of _her._

Most days, hope is all she had.

//

Her human life is slowly becoming her own now. Miss Grant has let her venture out into reporting, and although she didn’t like Snapper, he was her boss, and so when he told her to cover some science convention, she agreed. It might turn out to be good; she is— _was,_ she painfully reminds herself—part of an advanced civilization and since she has gotten used to backwards technology in the past eight months or so, she looks forward to some normalcy.

Kara spends her time walking around. People are socializing with scientists in booths. None of them are really breakthroughs, at least from a Kryptonian’s perspective, so she tries to do her job instead. She walks around and asks people questions, gives her card, and she rounds the corner from a nanobot technology showcase to find her.

Or at least, whom she thinks is her. Her dark hair frames her pale skin, much paler now in this planet, Kara supposes, and though the eyes she had always found herself lost in were no longer auburn but green in this planet, Kara still finds the same feeling of being home in them and she stops in her tracks, almost drops everything, and it feels like coming home, finally.

“Lena.”

//

It was her first day in the building. After the achievement of her life-long dream of being in _the_ Science Guild, Kara excitedly made her way into the building and tripped, face first, right in front of everyone going about their way. Kara heard giggles around her and she huffed.

“Are you alright?” A voice said, and Kara looked up to see a dark-haired girl, about her age, offering her hand. Kara just nodded and took her hand.

“M’fine. Just excited,” she mumbled as she got up.”

The girl smirked. “First day?”

Kara nodded.

“Good luck,” the girl said, before walking away. She stopped after her second step and looked back at Kara. “Try not to fall on your face again.”

Kara just huffed once more.

//

Kara was eagerly discussing some of her theories with a couple of new friends she had made when a voice chimed in, telling her she was wrong. The girl looked to the source of the argument and narrowed her eyes at the girl who had helped her up earlier. The dark-haired girl only continued her point, enumerating each with a finger on her left hand as Kara’s supposed new friends nodded along. When she was done successfully rebutting all of Kara’s points, she smirked.

“I suppose Kara of the great House of El doesn’t know everything, hm?”   

Kara narrowed her eyes. “How do you know who I am?”

“Hard not to know anyone from that family,” she said. Kara just frowned further. She hated having to have expectations on her because of her family name.

“It isn’t fair that you know who I am and I don’t know who you are,” Kara pointed out.

The girl just smirked again. “Someone who just proved you wrong,” she said, before leaving once more.

//

The dark-haired girl was an annoying know-it-all. A very gorgeous but annoying know-it-all who seemed to like to keep proving Kara wrong, and though she had to admit that her intelligence was attractive, _sue her,_ Kara just thought she was...annoying. It was frustrating.

What was even more frustrating was how Kara seemed to find herself in her orbit, all the time. Maybe it was her mystery. She still didn’t know her name, and when she asked around, most people just shrugged, as if they had warnings not to tell Kara who the girl was, and it made things all the more frustrating.

//

“Are you ever going to tell me your name?” Kara asked, finally, one time after the girl just broke down an argument she had outlined for a proposal to the Council.

The girl just smiled at her—it was different, this time, not her usual teasing smirks, but like she was actually...endeared. “Depends,” she said. “Will you go out with me if I tell you?”

//

Her name was Lena.

//

“Stop staring at me,” Lena mumbled, though her eyes were still on the book in front of her. Kara just giggled.

“I have to go,” she said, pressing a soft kiss on the dark-haired girl’s cheek. “Aunt Astra is looking for me.”

Lena looked up at her, finally, sighing before smiling again. “You’ll call me?”

Kara promised she would. She got up to leave, feeling Lena’s eyes on her, and when she looked back, the girl was indeed staring, smiling, and Kara smiled back.

//

“You’re wrong,” Lena pointed out, and Kara just snorted and proceeded to prove that she was indeed, right.

“I’m right, I’ll bet you three nights of cuddles of me being the little spoon,” Kara said with a simple shrug and a grin.

“Make it five,” Lena countered, and Kara just nodded easily. The dark-haired woman laughed. “I know you’re right. I win, however. I like being the big spoon.”

Kara scowled. Or pretended to, anyway; it was hard to hide the smile in her eyes.

//

There were days when they would just lie in the silence of their shared bed, letting time fly by.

“Beloved?” Lena whispered, breaking the quiet. Kara hummed and turned to her side to smile at her.

“Yes?”

“I’m glad I found you.” Lena said.

Kara’s heart caught in her chest. “So am I,” she whispered back, before pulling her into a kiss that promised her lifetimes.  

//

Kara woke up with a jolt, a gasp on her lips and lack of air in her lungs. She could still see the military taking away her aunt Astra, and a sob caught the rest of her breath, but then there were arms around her, a soothing voice in her ear.

“I’m here,” Lena whispered, and Kara cried against her shoulder as the woman drew aimless patterns against her skin, comforting her in the best of ways.

//

They should have known Jor-El and Astra were right, but no one really listened to them. Kara woke up with a jolt in Lena’s arms, and the woman sat up quickly too, as they felt the earth shake beneath them. There were screams. The couple threw on their clothes and ran out of their dwelling to see the sky burning, Krypton in its dying moments, people running for help, children crying.

“Kara, this way,” Lena called out for her, voice ever so calm and certain even in the storm they were in the middle of.  They ran to the hangar just above Lena’s home and before Kara could ask what was happening, the woman was pushing her into the pod.

“What are you—”

“Just get in, beloved, I’m putting in coordinates,” Lena explained. There was an explosion outside and the building trembled, shaking under their feet. Lena repeated herself, more adamantly this time, and Kara scrambled to climb into the pod.

“The coordinates are set to Earth,” Lena yelled above crashing and beeping. “Similar to Krypton, but with a yellow sun.” She took a shuddering breath and met Kara’s gaze. “Do you trust me?”

Kara’s gaze never faltered. “With my life and the next ones, my love.”

“Good.” Lena smiled and closed the pod. “I’ll find you, beloved.” Almost silence filled Kara’s ears as the pod closed, like she was underwater, and there was glass between her and the woman who stood within her reach but not quite.

“No, no, Lena, no!” She screamed, punching the glass, then trying to press buttons in front of her but nothing happened. Kara’s pod lifted off the ground and within seconds headed on to its way, and last thing Kara saw was _her,_ standing still, watching her leave like she always did.

Kara was barely out of the atmosphere when Krypton exploded, the force of it rocking Kara’s pod off its course.

//

“Kara,” Lena says, voice breaking, and there is disbelief and sheer happiness in her eyes despite her tears . Arms are suddenly wrapped around Kara, strong, unwavering, and the woman sobs against her neck and Kara feels like coming home, amongst all these strangers, with the love of her life in her arms.

“Lena,” she whispers back, and she can hear Lena’s heartbeat again, amplified with how it pounded against her own chest, against her ears, and Kara commits it all to memory. She has lost count of the days, but nothing feels more significant than the woman in her arms, now. Lena holds on to her like she never wants to let go and Kara doesn’t want her to, anyway, not after such time apart, and though the ache of losing Krypton burns like a thousand dying stars in her chest, hope blooms in the midst of it, soft fire like the hearth warming her, giving her hope anew. She feels like being born again, in this planet, in Lena’s arms, and though the grief of loss remains she knows she no longer has to bear it alone. “You found me.”

Lena pulls away, just enough to meet Kara’s gaze, and her smile is soft and warm like Kara remembers. Her eyes are green, bright and full of life, so different from how her eyes looked in Krypton but still holds so much love for Kara. “I promised you I’d find you.”

//

Kara jolts awake. Lena is there in a heartbeat, kissing her nightmares away with assurances of _I’m here, beloved,_ and the chaos of the city beyond is silent as all Kara could hear is _her._

**Author's Note:**

> i don't know what the hell this is but it was a prompt i think


End file.
